Lionel Grand's unexpected visit was a pleasant surprise. He was an entertaining guest and told us some anecdotes about his encounters during his performance tours. He was also interested in hearing about the cat community here in Mellowdene. I might tell you about them in a future tale. After all, his appearance had already postponed the tale I was going to tell.
An hour before finding Lionel vacuuming my living room (I had to finish up that particular task) I had been socialising in the East Dock Lane snack bar. Board games and Captain Seadog's brothers aside, there was another attendee I'd not expected to see. Young Oscar Marmalade.
Oscar is one of three apprentice crew members who are learning nautical work from Horatio Seadog and his brothers. The youngsters split their time with academic studies at the school (the apprentice programme) and practical training for a job on boats and so forth. Horatio has told me his 'motley crew' are enthusiastic and excellent at their work aboard the
Marita May, and their apprenticeship will soon be completed.
The Motley Crew, whilst still physically quite small, are reportedly strong little critters and highly capable sailors.
At the snack bar, Oscar told me that he had a few exams to do at school, then - assuming all went well - he was free to join the Seadogs full time. He had taken his first exam and was now relaxing with Irwin and Owen. Murky Waters and Twitch Hazelwood had another year of schooling, and they were currently aboard the Marita May with Horatio, Amos and Beaky Webster. Consequently, Oscar was feeling quite grown up and was more talkative. Physically, he didn't look much different to the young bear who had discovered the stowaway Orton Butterglove two years ago. This contrasted with his manner and attitude which were far more mature. This was a confident young bear.
One subject was his younger siblings, the identical twins Ottilee and Oonagh.
"You see, Mr Butterglove, it was my mum behind it," said Oscar. "Because my sisters looked so similar, she thought they should act 'as a set'. Dress the same, work together and present themselves as if they were the same person."
Irwin Seadog raised his eyes in response.
"I know, Irwin," said Oscar. "And when they were tiny it was cute. I suppose we thought that they'd start to look increasingly different from each other as they grew older. There'd be no point in presenting themselves as if they were identical."
"But they do still look incredibly similar," I said, effectively reinforcing his tale.
"They do. And mum still wanted them to accentuate that."
"There's a 'but' coming, isn't there?"
"Yes. They didn't want to go against mum, but they were becoming uncomfortable with everything."
"Not being seen as individuals?"
"Yep. Oonagh started to complain to me, but didn't know what to do. She knew our mum loved us and..."
"She was conflicted."
"Yes. I had an idea. Try and show subtle differences and increase it over time."
"And?"
"They tried it, Mr Butterglove. Oonagh washed all her dresses with extra detergent, trying to leach the colour. Ottilee started wearing a hat."
"Did that work?"
"Mum noticed. She wasn't too happy, so the plan was abandoned. The clothes are still slightly different but that's as far as it goes. The hat is banished to the wardrobe."
"What about your dad?" asked Irwin.
"He always supports mum. United parenting, I supposed, but last year dad said I was old enough to know the main reason. When my sisters were born it was thought they wouldn't make it. When they did, mum found it hard to separate them in her mind. By treating them as one, she thought that if ever one sister should come to harm, the other would - in a sense - keep them alive."
Irwin regarded the solemn young bear curiously. Oscar must have noticed. He smiled.
"Oh, I know it's a little odd, and it took me a while to get my head around it."
"Poor Margot," Irwin said, "but that doesn't help your sisters. It's a sad situation for them to be in."
Oscar laughed. "It was. It isn't now."
I was curious why that should be. Oscar was happy to explain.
"Mix and Match happened."
'Mix and Match' are the nicknames of Mitchell and Maxwell Brighteyes. These two rabbits are also identical twins but they revel in their similarity.
Before they moved to Mellowdene to live with their Uncle Howard and Aunt Marion they had already taken advantage of their mirrored appearance to construct inventive pranks that entertained them and bamboozled their 'victims'.
Upon attending Mellowdene School the teachers thought it would help prevent confusion if they attended separate classes. This didn't stop the sibling rabbits from taking advantage of the situation. Mitch was good at mathematics and science. Max was good at language and writing. By clever analysis of school timetables the cheeky bunnies would swap places in order to do the subjects at which they excelled - twice. It continued for some time but was exposed when the timetables changed at short notice. The school wasn't happy.
This didn't faze the irrepressible pair. They laughed, took their punishment without complaint, then started to think about their next endeavour.
Meeting Oonagh and Ottilee, they were delighted to find other amazingly identical twins. They didn't really understand why the Marmalade sisters wanted to be completely distinct from one another, but quickly accepted that was just how things were. Ripe for a prank though.
As they discussed the situation at their aunt's Blackcurrant Cafe, they were careful not to be overheard.
"Look," said Mitch. "You're going about this the wrong way."
"What do you mean?" asked Ottilee.
"If your parents want you to be identical..." started Mitch.
"...be EXTRA identical..." said Max.
"...and if you do it right, it'll drive your mum and dad crazy."
"I don't know if we want to do that," said Oonagh, "as we love them."
"Oh," said Max, "we know that. You don't fancy learning how to talk in unison? Okay. Then..." He winked at Mitch as a cue for him to continue.
"...go the subtle route. Play swapsies."
Ottilee and Oonagh went into training. They spent painstaking care to fine tune their appearance so that the tiniest physical difference between them was invisible. They worked on their voices so that they could speak with pitch and intonation indistinguishable from one another. They worked on their movement and deportment.
Mitch and Max were their mentors throughout and it's fair to say that the Marmalade sisters quite enjoyed the process. A few weeks of this and the Brighteyes twins told them they were ready.
The first opportunity to test their skills related to the afternoon drama club run by Kenneth Furbanks. Oonagh had been attending there a few months. On this occasion, when Oonagh left school to go to the Furbanks' house, Ottilee changed into one of Oonagh's dresses, did a few vocal exercises to adopt her sister's persona and then went home.
When she entered the garden her mum smiled at her. "Hello, love. Aren't you supposed to be at drama club?"
Internally, Ottilee smiled. Oonagh's paler dress had done its work.
"Ah, mum," she said, "they don't need me today. I've got some homework anyway."
"Oh? Then I suppose it worked out well."
"Yes. I think I'll do my homework now, mum. Get it out of the way," said Ottilee, moving towards the house.
"Good girl. Have you seen your sister?"
"Not since school. It's a nice day. You know Ottilee likes walking in the sun."
"Well she knows what time we have our tea. You get on, dear."
And then she was inside. It had worked! Mum hadn't seen who she really was. And without any lying - after all, the drama club didn't need her, she did like walking and she did have homework to do. A mischievous grin crept onto her face.
Oonagh had her chance to impersonate Ottilee a few days later. Again, they'd planned it so that the initial exposure was short, but Oonagh found herself facing both parents.
"So, Ottipotty," said Maurice, rubbing the back of her head, "can we expect Oonagh home anytime soon?"
"Yes, I do like to see both my favourite girls," said Margot.
Oonagh had discussed various scenarios with her sister. Mitch and Max had stressed the importance of planning and communication, so her parents' questions were expected. It helped that Ottilee had told her of her encounter with their mum.
"Oh, I expect you'll see us both soon."
"Did she say where she was going?"
"I haven't seen Oonagh since this morning," said Oonagh, thinking of her reflection in the dressing table mirror, "but I know if she doesn't go to drama club she's curious about what she's missed."
Irwin Seadog laughed. "How did they keep all this straight in their heads? Remembering who they were supposed to be, where they said each of them would be compared to where they were, and so on?"
Oscar's mouth twitched. "They tried to explain to me but I got lost. It must be a twinny thing."
"I'm still not sure exactly what they meant to achieve, Oscar," I said.
"Oh you will, as eventually something came of it. They did this sort of thing two or three more times then moved onto the next stage."
"Which was?"
"Being there together. They'd disguised their minor physical differences so it was only their clothing, talking and movement habits that allowed anyone to see who was Oonagh and who was Ottilee."
"And your parents had no idea?"
"My sisters looked so similar, they didn't need to tweak too much. They told me that they wanted mum and dad to rely on their clothing for identification. It was during this stage they confirmed that had worked."
"How?"
"They'd make an excuse to go upstairs, and they'd change clothes and identities before coming down again."
I looked at Irwin who was shaking his head with mirth. "And I thought my childhood antics with Owen were odd."
"Well that's my sisters. We had three weeks of this before the final stage. And they were delighted to tell me all about it."
The two sisters walked confidently into the room. In step. Identical clothes. In unison they said, "Hello Mum. Hello Dad."
Margot and Maurice turned to see their daughters. Their smiling faces slowly froze.
"Oonagh? Ottilee?"
"Yes?" They both spoke, but using the inflection of each other’s voice.
Maurice wrinkled his brow but Margot smiled. "Oh, it's lovely to see my gorgeous girls in the same clothes." She thought she knew which twin was which. She was wrong.
They didn't lie about who they were, but used each other’s voices to speak. They also adopted their sister's idiosyncrasies; the Brighteyes twins had helped them identify these during training. This continued for around ten minutes. A subtle signal, and they swapped.
Maurice scratched his head. Margot didn't notice the switch at first, but confusion soon crept onto her face. Nevertheless she became used to the voices and characteristics of her daughters and relaxed again.
When they switched again, Maurice was the one who smiled. Maybe he figured out what was happening but he didn't call it out. Margot's speech became distracted when she realised she was apparently addressing the wrong sister. Even so, she didn't ask for any sort of clarification. Not until the next swap.
"Yes, mum?" said Oonagh in Ottilee's voice.
More confusion. "Wait. You're Ottilee."
"No mum," said Ottilee in Oonagh's voice, "I'm Ottilee."
Margot's turned rapidly to her other daughter.
"Aw mum, I'm not Ottilee," said Oonagh in her own voice, and Margot's head snapped back.
"And I'm not Oonagh," said Ottilee in her own voice.
Margot brought her paws up to her face. "What's happening?"
Maurice gave out a belly laugh. "You've got the identical girls you always wanted, my love."
Margot peeked out from behind her paws. "Not like this..." she said, then her husband's laughter infected her. "Oh, my darling daughters, you..."
"...need to be individuals?" prompted Maurice.
Margot Marmalade finally realised what she'd been doing for years. "I've been selfish. But no more, my darlings. You're not just one set of twins. You're TWO wonderful girls."
There were hugs all around. And once this was over, Margot had a pair of final comments that showed things really had changed.
"Oonagh, do you want to change your dress? And Ottilee, you can wear your hat if you'd like to..."
Oscar sat back after finishing his tale.
"So, all is well," said Irwin. "I bet your sisters are relieved."
Oscar laughed, as if from some secret memory. "Yes, you're right. But they probably had too much fun pretending to be each other."
"What makes you say that?"
"It's just that I wonder how the village would cope with another Mix and Match..."
