Of course, although I refer to us collectively as Buttergloves, there are other surnames I should mention, linked to us by marriage. You will already be aware that my darling wife was born Cecile Ivory. My brother Merlin and my cousin Samantha both married sibling Dandelions. My cousin Jonathan and the sister-in-law of my other brother Newton both married Cornflowers. I know. It can get a bit involved! The point is, we all get on incredibly well and I am thankful to be part of their lives.
A Butterglove Garden Party |
Eliza doesn't mind me telling you that Beverley, Brendan and Russell help to fill a gap in her life because she can't have children of her own.
She discovered this two years into her marriage, when Cecile and I were still courting. It came as a blow as she had so much love to give. I believe it was Rowan who came up with a possible solution that led to old Artimus McCavity turning up on our doorstep with an intriguing bundle.
Artimus McCavity was one of the hill cats who lived in one of the cottages north-east of Mellowdene. Even before Lawrence Seabreeze took an active part in the canal refurbishment, canal boats still provided an essential link to the cat families and beyond, and Artimus owned a canal boat that brought fresh water fish to be sold in the village store. Eliza used to work part-time for Rocky Babblebrook in the store, so she knew Artimus. It was she that the grizzled old cat had come to see.
"Hello, 'liza," he said. "I is hopin' you can give us some advice about this here little 'un."
From the bundle he folded back the cloth to reveal a new baby. However, it wasn't a rabbit, beaver or any other baby from the many races of Sylvanian crittizens. It was a tiny Sylvanian Mountain Hog.
"It's an orphan hoglet that me grandson found," said Artimus. "It's too young to manage on its own, so I wondered if you might know o' someone..."
A tiny snout slowly extended towards Eliza. Its end was shaped like a small heart and the minute nostrils opened and closed with the sound of blown kisses.
"Oh, he's adorable," cooed Eliza, reaching out towards the innocent eyes of the baby hog. Merlin appeared behind her.
"Oh, hello Mister Merlin," said Artimus. "I hear you knows a bit about animals. What does you think?"
Merlin didn't really know that much more about animals than any other regular Sylvanian, but he did know his wife and could see her reaction to the baby animal. Still, there were questions to be asked. Questions such as: what do Sylvanian Mountain Hogs eat? What about baby ones? What do they need to thrive?
Artimus chewed on the inside of his lip before replying.
"Vegetable peelings. Fruit leftovers. Cut up small to start with, but there'll be no need after a couple of months. Somewhere soft and sheltered to sleep. But most of all they'll need love. Cuddles. They is affectionate and loyal to their families I hear."
When Merlin saw Eliza's wide eyes he knew that the hoglet would become part of their family.
"We could call him Snorker Butterglove," suggested Eliza, taking the bundle into her arms. In response, a series of quick kissing noises emerged.
Merlin burst out in laughter. "All that kissing, perhaps we should name him after your brother Denzel."
"I like that," giggled Eliza, " but Denzel Butterglove? That wouldn't do - it could get confusing. How about Snorker Dandelion?"
And that's how Snorker became an addition to the household and the first "new baby" in the family since cousin Jonathan was born some years ago. True to Artimus's words - the little hog was loyal and affectionate, and Eliza was happy.
o 0 O 0 o
As time progressed Snorker was supplemented by our three children and the gap in her life became even less noticeable.
Four new babies came as a shock to Denzel and Samantha, and they had the additional concern that their elder daughter Lena might feel neglected because of the attention the newborns would require. Cousin Bobbie was on hand to help, but it was Eliza who stepped in to make things manageable.
The babies are older now, but they present new challenges. Not the least of which is their uncanny mobility. If there was to be a Sylvanian Olympic event for a crawling relay, then Lupin, Larkspur, Lavender and Lobelia would take the gold medal.
Samantha has told me about one particular occasion involving the quads.
o 0 O 0 o
One sunny day Denzel Dandelion responded to a knock at his front door and was faced with a smiling bear wearing an enormously brimmed brown hat.
"Hello, Denzel," said Henry Bearbury, "and no - it's not an official call. I was just in the area and I thought I'd visit some of the more recent Mellowdene arrivals. See how things are."
"You're always welcome, Henry. Come in."
Samantha had just completed a batch of washing and was about to sit down when Denzel brought Henry into the room. She smiled at the visitor. "Hello, Doctor," she said.
"Doctor? How long have we known each other?"
She smiled again, crinkling her tired eyes as both she and Henry sat down. "Sorry, Henry. What can we do for you?"
"I was wondering if you'd decided to dump this Dandelion chap and run away with me to the seaside."
"Oy!" said Denzel, laughing.
Henry's solemn expression dissolved into a good-natured grin. "I've been visiting the Hamiltons to do a quick check-up on young Georgie." He noticed Samantha raise her brows. "He's doing well. I recommended that he continues to protect himself from direct sun for the time being, but all looks well."
Denzel interrupted. "Huckleberry was saying how grateful they are to you. They had resigned themselves to losing him..."
"Old news, Denzel. I'm glad I had the knowledge to help." He cleared his throat. "Anyway - as I was leaving, I thought that it would be a good opportunity to call here and see how you're all doing. How are you coping with the four bunnies of the apocalypse?"
Samantha chuckled. "They are a lot of work. But worth it, Henry."
Denzel moved to Samantha's side and rubbed her shoulder.
"There's plenty of family support, Henry. Sam's sister Bobbie is only a couple of rooms away. And you know my sister Eliza lives nearby; she is always happy to give Sam a rest."
"She is marvelous, Henry," said Samantha. "I was worried that she might feel a little neglected, but she's starting to act like a little mother herself."
"We give her lots of love," said Denzel. "I had to laugh the other day. She was trying to persuade her cousin Biddie to help her change some nappies. Biddie wasn't having any of it. 'No,' she said, 'the Hazelwoods run a perfectly good business that handles mucky jobs.' She wanted to telephone Mice & Clean to get a job quotation!"
The three of them laughed. Henry relaxed in his chair. "So how are the quads? I know they're not due their next examination for a couple of weeks, but I have a soft spot for them. It's not often I get to help deliver four babies."
Samantha nodded. "They're crawling."
"Really? Such tiny dots?"
"They're crawling fast. I don't know how they manage to shift themselves so quickly when they're on all fours."
"I had to make them a cage," said Denzel.
"What?" Henry's laughter was uncertain.
"That's what I call it. It's a sort of holding area to restrict their crawling to a part of the nursery."
"We had to do something," explained Samantha. "They'd all set off in different directions at speed. Trying to catch them was exhausting. Not to mention a worry."
"And I can move the cage in sections, so we can move the quads from room to room as needed," added Denzel.
"Uhuh," nodded Samantha. "It's made things a little easier. They're in it now, in the nursery."
"Would you like to see it, Henry?" asked Denzel, eager to show off his handiwork.
Henry was quiet. He raised his arm and pointed to the open doorway.
"I think I just saw a fast-crawling baby."
o 0 O 0 o
Rushing into the hallway it was confirmed. It was a baby. Lobelia gurgled as Denzel scooped her up.
"How on earth did she get here?" Samantha hissed, "AND down the stairs!"
Henry forestalled any heated discussion. "Hadn't we better check on the others?"
Samantha sprinted up the staircase and there was a strangled groan when she reached the nursery. When Denzel and Henry reached her side they looked into 'the cage'. It was empty.
Cushions had been pushed up to the side of the structure and a blanket hung down the other side. It appeared the quads were more than rapid crawlers. They'd managed an effective escape plan.
Henry pushed his palm up over his forehead. "If they could achieve this, then I think it likely they could figure out getting down the stairs safely."
"But where are they?" sobbed Samantha.
Denzel handed Lobelia to his wife. "Look after Billie. Henry and I will find the others."
o 0 O 0 o
Larkspur and Lavender were found snuggling under a pile of washing.
There was plenty of giggling once they saw their daddy. Lupin wasn't anywhere near them. So where was he? Surely he couldn't have found a way out of the house? After half an hour, the decision was made to seek extra help.
Barely five minutes later, Eliza Butterglove arrived at the house with the necessary help. Snorker.
Snorker was, by this time, a mature hog in his prime. However, despite being as affectionate a creature as ever, he greeted Samantha and Denzel in a subdued manner, as if sensing something was wrong. When offered some of Lupin's clothes to smell, Snorker understood what was required.
Starting in the nursery he sniffed around the cushions and led Eliza out of the nursery, down the staircase and into the hallway.
He stopped by the front porch where Henry Bearbury had left his hat.
Henry carefully rotated his hat so that they could see inside. Curled up, fast asleep, was Lupin Dandelion.
Denzel reached for the last of his errant babies and lifted him into his arms.
"I think he needs changing," sniffed Denzel.
He glanced at Henry Bearbury. "And we'll pay for your hat to be cleaned."
Snorker blew a sequence of kisses, and the tension dissipated.
Samantha sighed. "How do we stop this happening again, Den?"
"The cage needs a roof."
o 0 O 0 o